Girl Scouts Face $5M Lawsuit
$5 Million Lawsuit Claims Girl Scout Cookies Are a Health Hazard
Source: MediaNews Group/Boston Herald via Getty Images / Getty
Well, well, well—looks like the Girl Scouts may have gotten a little too extra with their cookies. You thought those Thin Mints were your sweet, guilt-free treat, but now it turns out they’re packing a little more than just minty goodness. Aluminum? Arsenic? Lead? Mercury? Yikes. According to a lawsuit, these iconic cookies are apparently serving up a toxic cocktail of heavy metals and pesticides. Because, you know, why not make every childhood snack a health hazard?
The lawsuit’s asking for a cool $5 million, and Girl Scouts are out here playing it cool, claiming their cookies meet the FDA’s food safety standards. But let’s be real: when you have mercury chilling in your Peanut Butter Patties, it’s hard to believe that’s just “good ol’ FDA-approved goodness.” And let’s not forget the levels of glyphosate (yep, the pesticide used in weed killers) found in these treats. Thin Mints were apparently the worst offenders. Go ahead, dunk those bad boys in your coffee; just don’t forget to wash it down with a detox smoothie, I guess.
Now, the Girl Scouts aren’t backing down. They’ve posted a whole blog on their website, basically saying, “Hey, it’s nature, not us! Heavy metals happen!” They claim those trace amounts are just a side effect of plant-based ingredients and that all foods, even organic ones, can get a little “contaminated” from soil. But no worries—eating trace amounts of lead and mercury probably won’t hurt you. So go ahead, enjoy that cookie, and hope your body is as resilient as their marketing team’s excuses.
As for the lawsuit, they’re claiming violations of New York consumer protection laws, and they’re hoping to make sure future boxes of Girl Scout cookies are a little more transparent—like, maybe with a warning label: “Caution: May contain lead. And joy.”
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